Sunday, November 8, 2009
im so confused now .
i just want to end everything ,
i haven been so unhappy for awhile..
such hurting words ,
misunderstandings...
why is all this happening to me ..
you told girlfriend i blocked you on msn
& i had a new guy thats why i was so cold towards you..
you told girlfriend i replied your long messages with short ones..
i never blocked you !
i dont have any reason to !
is not being online considered as blocking you ?!
and if i had a new guy i would just tell you !
why are you just assuming !
i thought you were different..
im so tired..
today ;
when i read your messages tt girlfriend forwarded to me..
i could help it but just cry ..
all these misunderstandings towards me..
im such a fool..
letting my feelings get over my head again..
i wont fall in love again ..
im not going to hurt my heart again..
its just not worth all the tears i cried ..
11:03 AM
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
urgh ;
was controlling my tears to whole day in school .
):
boohoos ?
urgh .
urgh .
urgh .
mad edi .
wanted to see him today ,
but uhhhh ,
cant bring myself to see him today ..
feel so weird .
D:
no idea .
heart's aching & still working .
yeah ,
its still beating .
slowly .
must hold on ,
& regain composure .
i wont cry anymore .
bestie !
are you reading ?
i miss you ey ,
where's my hug !
11:04 PM
Monday, November 2, 2009
so lost ,
so alone .
boy ; we arent going anywhere ..
why do i feel as if you are slipping away from me..
you treat me so cold..
why do you keep saying im cold to you..
what do i have to do to show you im not..
my heart aches with every hurting word you say ..
this piercing pain rocks my world ..
throwing me off balance &
throwing me side to side..
what am i going to do..
everytime i catch a glimpse of you ,
my heart skips a beat ..
i have no idea why .
i know we cant be together.
but why ,
why do i have this hope in me ..
then grows day by day ..
im so afraid that the day comes ,
the day that you say you're just fooling around .
that you say we aren't anything at all ..
this growing hope of mine ,
it may just cause me to fall ..
in a neverending abyss of sadness .
im so afraid of the dark .
because i cant see anything .
i cant see whats happening ..
please shed some light ,
please give me some clue ,
that you arent just playing with me..
even though i know ,
im still hanging on the msia incident .
im still so afraid of guys touching me..
but i dont know..
i've clenched my teeth ,
i've held on .
i just let you do anything to me..
but this ,
im such a fool .
even though tears fall ,
why do i let you do this to me..
maybe i treasured you more than i knew..
guy ;
all the tears i've cried and cried ..
please take them away..
i dont want to cry anymore .
i want to smile ,
to laugh with my heart .
with this broken heart of mine .
10:29 PM
