Friday, December 26, 2008
im imperfect.
im fat.
im ugly.
everytime during dance lessons,
my heart hurts..
i look around,
why m i not the same?
why m i born without a proper waist?
ppl think im just too fat.
i know i am.
im not going to eat anymore.
i dont even know whether i'll work.
i really hate ppl talking behind my back.
no matter good or bad.
i just hate it.
if you really wan to talk about me.
please...
dont let me know.
not a clue.
not a glance.
i beg youe.
youe wont know how much it hurts.
i've been crying..
so much..
maybe its like he said.
i need love.
but i know,
im not worth any love.
i'll screw everything up..
im just..
too imperfect.
i stare at you all.
why are all of you.
so pretty, so slim.
so amiable.
im not any of these.
&& i know.
i'll nvr be.
although im sick..
im going to run tmr.
im fat.
i need exercise.
i really do.
im going to run.
run until i cant run anymore.
run until i'll collapse.
you'll be my only fuel.
you'll be my only thought.
"i must carry on running for youe"
i must..
i must be strong.
i mustnt snap.
if i snap i know,
i'll die.
sigh..
why does it have to be me?
how i wish i could end everything with a knife.
then i could leave..
without worries.
&& i'll wait for you.
in heaven.
10:57 PM
